Poetry: My Eternal Dream

I wrote this poem when I was a teenager.  At the time, I wasn't aware that I was feeling suicidal.  I convinced myself that I wrote this poem purely from inspiration and not my true feelings.  Looking back, I realize that I really was feeling this way.  It's interesting what I've learned about myself from looking back at things I've written years ago.  Feel free to comment you feelings or share poetry of your own in the comments.  If you've ever felt this way, please know that you're not alone!

My Eternal Dream

I close my eyes in search of a sign

But all my thoughts make me feel more behind

No one knows the way that I feel

Not even I can tell what's real

I've lived in the past for so long

I don't even know what's right and what's wrong

I wish you'd tell me what to do

But you don't even have a clue

I don't know if I should run and scream

Or close my eyes and wake up in a dream

All my thoughts make me doubt my worth

Cause you're not here with me on Earth

I'll admit this decision was tough

But the way things are just isn't enough

So when I go to sleep tonight

That's when I'm gonna take my life

So please let me tell you what is real

Please let me try and tell you how I feel

Cause if you can't be here with me

I'll close my eyes and I'll be free